The Cruel C…and A (Changi & Ayatollah). Luckily we all like Bing Lee.
WHY BURWOOD ?
This was a question which occupied most of the conversation at the On On.
That, and the Fried Rice. It was a question which Changi steadfastly refused
to answer, suggesting all should refer to the Year Book.
Fortunately for the statistically minded, Major Disaster lost his way en
route to Burwood and pitched up after 7pm. Some thirty minutes late, the
poor old bugger plodded off into the darkness following the In Trail.
Taking the overhead bridge on Parramatta Road, he turned into Moreton
Street where a fracas of monumental proportions was taking place.
Defending the front doors of houses dotted up and down the street, were
aged old bastards in night attire, armed with saucepans and frying pans
beating off a horde of dark skinned individuals, men, women and children,
who appeared to be trying to gain entry. Gabbling away in some heathen
tongue, the “attackers” pointed furiously at the word “HOME” chalked on the
pavement in front of the house and the large, broad arrows which led up to
the front gate.
MajorD said it was very entertaining whilst it lasted, eventually seven
Paddy Wagons arrived to haul off the assailants, leaving a couple of
bemused policemen and the Major standing in the now quiet street.
Hesitatingly he sought an explanation. The Head Walloper said obviously
some hard up real estate agent who couldn’t afford a proper advertising sign
was flogging homes in the area, and had picked the wrong street.
The Major continued on and found a total of Fourteen “HOME” signs
scattered in the surrounding streets. Beating a hasty retreat back to the
Bucket, he left the Wallopers busily washing out the arrows and “HOME” signs
in the street and any others they could find.
And there were plenty.
Understandably when “Sought Muse”, the acting Trail Master, much later
arrived on the scene, the Trail had been washed out. Without hesitation he
directed the Pack to Parramatta Road and Home.
It is therefore completely unfair to suggest that “Sought Muse” had
reverted to type and Short Cut in a fit of pique. When pressed on the
quality of the Run in what is a very much “run-down” area, after pausing to
reflect, he said he thought the Run was as “Boring as Bat Shit”, and went on
his way clearly considering no further explanation was necessary.
So then, “Why Burwood ?”
It was only much later that evening, we learnt from Tic Toc that
Iouadollar, the Co-Hare, confidentially informed him whilst sharing a
urinal, that he had sold his fish and chip shop and taken up selling Real
Estate in the Burwood area. The Run was an ideal opportunity for him to seek
out some shacks in the area for sale.
With the Property Market taking a bit of a dive, Iouadollar short of the
readies to advertise properly, had hired local urchins to chalk “Home”
outside the properties he was selling. The little buggers misread the
instructions and the rest is history.
Forty-Two made it to Burwood and the On On, which is quite a feat considering the distance from their usual stamping grounds .
Amongst those present was Wally Grout, heavily disguised and subsequently
overlooked by the President for a Down Down. It was also good to see Jungle,
who was recognised, in our midst again.
The presence of so many having a good time made up for the food, which to be
charitable, was somewhat different. Changi was at his most inventive with
his description of the dishes, if not entirely believable.
Oh, and by the way, ignore the request from Khyber for shirt sizes, I have
heard from a source close to the Committee, that we are all getting walking
sticks. And God Knows say one size fits all.
Google Earth : Run 2293