The Storming of the Bastille du League Nord Sidnee and the Arrestation of Governor de Simmeau et Marquis Fling de Virgine.
The Storming Massacring Hareld
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First Run 1967 O N O N . A L W A Y S . Number 2453 July 7, 2014
Zut alors! Mon dieu mon amis!
Do you hear Posh people sing?
Singing a song like Jersey men?
It is the music of a people
Who will not be slaves again!
When the beating of your heart
Echoes the beating of the drums
There is a life about to start
When the new Committee comes!
STORMING OF THE BASTILLE Bastille Day – July 14, 1789
King Arthur and his entourage, although obliged to admit their defeat, didn’t approve the new Assembly.
On July 12th, 1789 The King dismissed his very popular Minister de Finances, Marquis Clevere Palmere.
On July 13th, 1789 a rumour spread in the streets of Cammeré of a coming counter attack by the King’s army to ‘destabilize’ the newly proclaimed parliamentarians.
On the evening of July 14th, 1789, a group formed of craftsmen, artisans, thespians, extremists and salesmen decided to fight for the right to enjoy a SurSur together. The pack, led by Lost Patrol et Hanoi Bill ran from the Principal Umbilical Precinct or PUP corner of the recently proclaimed Rues Abbott et Palmer to Miller macadam. In an effort to steal some time from the others, Petit Merde et Robbo they soon became Invalides after traversing Pont Nord to find a cheque worth nothing as no further track was to be found. Suddenly the marauding mob, led by Nautilus, Goonsher et Rodney (of whom more latere) plunged down, down steep steps into the darkness to Drunks Park, and stole the march, actually Juli, there. Across to the Nord Sidnei Gaff Clube again proved fruitless, claimed fruits Petit Merde et Benné. The crowd, notably Spud aka Pomme de Terror et Foxé knew that a pile of arrows and flour powder was stocked in the Bastille du League Nord Sidnee, a prison that was a symbol of King Arthur’s and the noblemen of the Nord Shorr absolute and arbitrary power.
So they decided to attack it via Rue Vernon. The anarchic army, now led by Kitté Littere et PeeDeub solemnly passed the memory of Revered Foot Soldier Sundance, to Folly Point, only to be rebuffed by a Czech Back (a loser from the recent Brazil Nancyboy bannedwagon). Soon the disparate dodgers, including Jungle Jeem et Centrepoinran headlong into Le Parque de Preemrose, halting only to smell the jockstraps of sportsmen past and the arses of several chiens and their masteres. Future historic war theatres were evoked at Tobruk as more battlements were assailed by Connection Francais et Ayatollah via unguarded steps. The invincibles , including Nautilus etHomme Musique were now hell-bent-over via Rue Reynolds, the mere grass of Grasmere untuft in slowing the momentum, across Cammeré Gaff Clube to their desperate destination.
At the time of the storming, the Bastille du League Nord Sidnee bucquet was only guarded by a few soldiers, “invalides”, veteran soldiers wounded in the field of earlier Hash skirmishes and one grenadier from the Swiss mercenary regiments, a frère de Lost Patrol. Marquis Connection de Francais was still governor of the “Invalides” having taken possession of le bucquet when it languished unguarded after fortuitous shert cutting.
The crowd was not big enough to impress the guards. Le Marquis Fling de Virgine fearing a growing anger among the revolutionaries, accepted nevertheless to meet some of their representatives inside the prison. He hoped to buy time, as he was expecting a rescue team to arrive shortly and to help him secure his castle. But the negotiations ended when the revolutionaries entered the Bastille. The guards were ordered to provide firewater, for hundreds of milling people, well about 35. The path of the revolt completely changed when the rescue team showed up and decided not to fight against but with the mob. With their canons and their professional soldier skills, they brought victory to the people of Cammeré against Governor de Simmeau et Marquis Fling de Virgine’s guards in a few minutes.
At 4pm, the Minister de Finances, Marquis Clevere Palmere surrendered and let the people enter the Bastille du League Nord Sidnee. The guards were violently killed and the Marquis was beheaded, with his head then put on a stake and carried all over Cammeré as a sign of victory. Some historians found the diary of King Arthur. On that day, July 14th, 1789 he only wrote “Nothing”. That was the result of his day’s hunting. When the Duc de Robbeauinformed the King of what happened at the Bastille, the King asked his advisor “is this a revolt?” and he was answered, “No Majesty, this is a revolution”.
Shortly after the storming of the Bastille, on 4 August feudalism was abolished and on 26 August, the Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen was proclaimed.
Bastille Day is celebrated in France on July 14. In 1789, this day marked a turning point in the French Revolution. Bastille Day became a French national holiday in 1880 and is commemorated to this day with festivals, fireworks, and food dans Cammeré. But what do French people eat on Bastille Day?
After the revolution ended, chefs who previously cooked for the nobles of the Hash began to open restaurants as their only means of making a living. The art of fine dining was born, and the world has never looked back. Here are some of the foods you will find served in French cafés et restaurants on Bastille Day.
Dinner often begins with a savoury, hot soup, like French Onion or Tomato Basil. Of course, the Soupe du Jour is often soup of the day. A salad as a main dish ensures the French that they will have plenty of room for dessert! However, pesto or basil pasta is also a popular French choice on Bastille Day. Having successfully stormed Le Bastille du League Nord Sidnee the exhausted attackers relished Cuisine de Clube’s agneau et pomme de terre, avec bier et vin rouge. Desserts and other treats are, of course, quite popular on Bastille Day. The French enjoy delicious pastries, parfaits, tarts, croissants, and banana cake with cholesterol cream for dessert (a PeeDeub favourite in his battle against anorexia). Crêpes are beautifully complemented by café au lait-shake, aussi a favourite of Once-a-noblemen PeeDeub.
Celebrations in 2014 continued into the night. Nobleman Goonsher’s half-nephew/half-centaur Rodney Rue (a derivative of Rude) was introduced to the recalcitrant rabble, with curled lips, a visible trait of the Goonsher family that stretches back as far as Goonsher himself. OnSexual Associate Kitty Litter advised revolutionaries to consider themselves part of the family, and update their profeel in the forth- or-even-fifth coming YearBook. As night closed in a further storm threatened at 8:45, the special omnibus awaited. Relief humeur was shared by Jungle Jeem(who told of the door knocker inventor who received the Nobel prize), Goonsher (who provided the definition of a wife as something you screw to the bed to get the washing-up done), et TToque (who trotted out the tale of the Fanny-Licking Frog—reddit, geddit?). At 8:57pm a wandering French Cinqtette presented to cries of Bravo, or Heavho, the sounds of Maurice Aznavor’s Ou est le Papier, and Do You hear Posh People Sing..beautifully. A standing ovation coincided with extinguishing of the lights, signalling time for the spent revolutionaries to hasten home to their cots each dreaming of retiring avec an ‘andful de French letters and a Brigitte Bardot hand-puppet (circa 1955).
Next week: Run 2455– Monday, July 21, 2014 –6:30p.m.
LOST PATROL (again!) & BENNY THE SWEDE (again!)
PShhh ! Private Posh Notes
SBends and Wombat are is touring North America (not together, silly) on behalf of the Hash. Wombat in Canadaand SBends currently in the heart of the Latin Quarter of Las Vegas. Your Choice is touring Europe on behalf of the Hash, scouting the best bars and diversions for the rest of the troupe, participating at the Brusselston Clayton’s InterHash: Music, Smiley, Jungle, Calici, Yakkity, Centrepoint, possibly Scotsman, 4X and Formerly Last Card Louis. Meanwhile, elsewhere in Europe, Swampy, Jack the Ripper, Daddy Long Legs, Super and Anniare swimming the waters off Malta, particularly gorgeous Gozo. Now in Tarogir about to swim for another week along the Dalmatian Coast and its many Islands. Probably about 3-5kms a Day. Wrappa is mopping up after the Shitbox Ralleists, Music, Jungle, Calici and TToc thundered thru the Kimberley recently..leaving tyres, nuts and bolts of his own in the ditches and water courses and wadis of this stark and beautiful land of ours. At the moment they are in CapeCrawford, 120 kms South of Borroloola, with another 400kms single lane bitumen to Camooweal. Kitty Litter andCinders competed in the Classic Sydney Quarter Marathon last weekend..Cinders won his age group (aren’t we all in that age group?) and Kitty was pipped by some prick, relegating our mate to Second in his age group! San Franciscotogether with WC and Virginus Illegitimus are getting back on their cycle saddles (watch out for them, even tho’ they plan to stick to off-road cycle tracks, you never know!) The Arbitrator now has his prostate outside his body, and will show it to you if you don’t mind the sight of formaldehyde. And we’re remembering Larry Adler who died a year ago after that nasty bike fall on Darley Street, Manly (It’s been tough time for Nan; she sends her warm wishes to the Hash).
BIRTHDAY BOYS:
Major Disaster Disaster, Tartan Bed, Tweety Pie.
NOW HEAR THIS…
Great News for all of us City2Surfers! SUNDAY, AUGUST 10. TheLarrikins are back on the grassy knoll at Bondi. All of us participating or who happen to be in the district, are invited to The Larrikins City to Surf Post Run BBQ. We are going back to the Hill at Bondi Beach, behind the surf club. Bring your own non-alcoholic cup or they will sell you one and something to put in it. The price will be the same as 5 years ago: 3 tickets for $10.00 Single tickets $5.00 as no coinage will be carried.