Run No. 2600 – 24th April 2017

TWO SIX OH OH

……….and none of you geniuses noticed that since the start of January the header to these posts has listed the Run No. in the 2900’s not the 2500’s.

What a surprise to see so many at the good ole Austrian Club – the website went down on Sunday night so the retirees amongst us who are so busy retiring that they don’t get a chance to check where the run is till Monday afternoon promptly shat themselves before making panic phones calls or sending urgent emails (Note: the On Sec definitely doesn’t sit glued to his inbox anytime especially on a Monday) – they obviously found where the run was.

Familiar territory for all and the Hares did a good job in containing the walk trail in a very small area. The runners on the other hand were extended out into Forestville with a jaunt through the shopping plaza before returning along the Curry St track to join up with the walk in Forestville Park. Runners and walkers arriving back at the bucket about the same time.

This being a Big celebration run meant that the Austrian Club would be a good choice as an On On venue – Big beers, Big schnitzels, Big strudel and a distinct lack of Big women. As one entered the club one was confronted with a microphone set up and mumbles of “there’s gunna be a performance”?
Whilst many wore their “giveaway shirt”, XXXX was resplendent in an all-white red wine magnet that looked like an outfit you’d wear to an Elvis Presley wedding – he reckons nothing else fits him. Ayatollah wore an Aussie-flag T-shirt – just to show up the Kiwis.

Early in the proceedings Pee Dub took to the floor for some humour – I was only ½ way through my schnitzel at this point. The Dub was struggling to read his script and admits he needs glasses – offers came thick and fast. So, someone’s wife was using the remote as a dildo. There was a chorus of “oh no!” from the bleachers.
Wee Willy made a stiff connection between a baby and a beamer.

Then the “performance” – Salt Petre was expecting the Hallelujah Chorus and Tooth Fairy thought a rendition of “Stairway to Heaven” would have been great but no, Smiley, Tic Toc and Music Man entertained us with “Factual Redhead”.

Phew! saved by the President. Downs tonight to Committee Hares Moishe and Plunger for starters. Then the punishment – Lurch, who admitted that for the first time ever (and ever is a f#&kin’ long time in Lurch’s case) he walked instead of running, and for Jack the Ripper whose Pacemaker must be long overdue for service as he “fell over a thousand times” tonight. Molly Meldrum was unlucky not to get a Down for his previous nights Logie win.

To finish the night Tic Toc told a true ANZAC story which slipped through our fingers.

On On
Bigamist